


I'll Love You Forever

by NightwingDiva



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Nightwing (Comics)
Genre: Angst, Depression, Dick Grayson imagine, F/M, Nightwing Imagine, Reader Insert, childhood cancer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-10
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-12 10:40:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11160201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NightwingDiva/pseuds/NightwingDiva
Summary: You and Dick are married and have a beautiful little girl named Mary. Your husband and daughter make your life complete, and you don't think you could be any happier.Then your world turns upside down when you hear the worst news a parent could imagine.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So forewarning this fic is going to have a lot of emotion and a healthy dose of angst.

“I’ll get Mary if you can get the pie.” You say as Dick parks the car in front of Wayne Manor. Though you and Dick have been married for several years, the sight of his childhood home still shocks you every now and then; at this point the building feels like home, but it still holds a certain intimidation.

“Sure thing, babe.” Dick smirks before getting out of the car. You follow suit, getting out and opening the back door where your little girl is waiting patiently in her car seat.

“Mommy are we going to see Grandpa?” Mary looks up at you with her father’s big blue eyes and refuses to let go of her Superman plush when you try to move it to unbuckle her.

“Yes we are. And Uncle Tim and Damian. And Aunt Steph and Cass. Everybody’s here because Grandpa wanted to have a big cook out. Uncle Jason and your cousins Matt and Rosie are here, too.”

“They are?!” Mary’s face lights up at the news, and in that moment it’s impossible to not see that she inherited her father’s enthusiasm. She drops her doll in the floorboard and starts scrambling to get out of the car as quickly as possible.

“Do me a favor and make sure your daughter gets into the house safely.” You sigh at Dick when Mary runs off toward the door.

Dick walks up to you and plants a quick kiss to your lips before handing you the pie dish. “Our daughter. And I can’t help it that my family is that exciting.”

“More exciting than you.” You smirk at him.

“Ah, yes, but you married me.” Dick laughs before running after Mary. You walk in after them, and you can tell Dick has caught her when you hear Mary’s squeal of laughter. With a smile, you set the dessert on the dining room table and follow the laughs of your family to the back yard, where an indecent amount of smoke limits your vision.

“Bruce, this is why nobody lets you grill.” Jason coughs and waves the smoke from in front of his face. “You’d burn the place down if we left you alone.”

“Don’t worry, Master Jason.” You hear Alfred before you actually see him. It doesn’t take long for the smoke to clear a bit, and you see that the butler is making his way toward a different grill. “I only let him play with that grill to think he’s helping. The real food we’ll be eating is coming from here.”

“Thank god.” Jason says.

“You wouldn’t happen to know where my children have gone, would you? You know. One of them is about the size of your kids and the other one is taller than me?” You ask with a slight cough.

“I think they are over there with the walking fire hazard.” Jason points to the heart of the smoke. “Good luck getting to them though.”

You thank Jason with a laugh before following Jason’s directions around the pool and to the grill. The smoke finishes clearing out to show Bruce holding Mary in his arms as she rubs his cheeks with her little hands. The size difference between the two of them is almost comical.

“Hey, Mary, why don’t we let Grandpa finish cooking? Matt and Rosie are playing with Titus, and you’d really be missing out if you didn’t join them.” Dick says before taking her from Bruce’s arms.

As soon as Dick mentioned Titus, Mary was ready to go. She barely gets an “Okay” out before running over to her cousins, her black curls bouncing with each step she takes.

“It’s good to see her acting like herself again.” Bruce says as he watches his grandchildren roll around in the grass. You stand next to Dick and lace your fingers through his.

“She’s been feeling better lately. Her headaches aren’t as frequent as they used to be.” You say, and Dick nods in agreement.

“So how are things in the nest, Brucie?” Dick asks to change the subject, knowing that you’d rather not think about the days when your daughter didn’t feel well. “Are the others keeping you busy?”

Bruce cast Dick a quick glare at the name ‘Brucie’ before sighing slightly. “It’s the usual. They all try to kill each other on a daily basis. I swear the only normal one is Cass.”

“You know you can’t really talk about ‘normal’ right? Since you dress up as a giant bat almost every night.” Dick smirks.

“And you dressed up as a songbird until you started wearing black spandex every night.” You poke Dick in the side causing him to squirm a bit. “I don’t think any of you can talk about being ‘normal’.”

“You’re right.” Dick smiles down at you. “But you love me anyway.”

“That I do.” You laugh before kissing him.

Peals of laughter draw your attention, and you see that Mary, Matt, and Rosie have decided to play tag. Jason makes his way toward you, Dick, and Bruce so that he can supervise his children better.

“I’m glad they can have this time together.” Bruce says. “They deserve to enjoy childhood while they can.”

“Yep. But what I want to know is when Tim joins the parenthood club.” Jason looks over at where Tim is typing away on his laptop at a shaded table. “You hear that, Timberly? When are you gonna start having babies? We need enough to form a basketball team!”

“Shut up, Jason. If you want more kids have them yourself.” Tim says without looking up.

“At least I have someone to have kids with.” Jason shoots.

You watch in entertainment as Jason and Tim bicker. Dick squeezes your hand a bit when you laugh at something, and you lean your head on his shoulder, content to spend this time with his family. Your family.

The children scream again, but this time it seems different somehow. You hear a splash and turn your head toward the sound, and you feel the world fall from underneath your feet.

“MARY!!!” You scream before you’ve fully taken in the scene before you. You don’t even recognize your own voice when the words escape your lips.

Every vigilante present immediately stops what they’re doing and takes action. Jason runs after his children, who are now crying in fear. Tim’s laptop crashes to the ground as he runs toward the pool, and another small fire starts at the grill when Bruce runs toward his oldest granddaughter. But Dick hits the water before anybody else.

You stare in shock and the strength leaves your knees as your daughter sinks deeper into the water.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the point at which I explain that I am not a medical expert whatsoever (my career path sadly doesn't pop up in fic writing), but I have tried to do some research so that this isn't terribly inaccurate.

You pace the length of the small, sterile hospital room waiting for the doctor to come in and give you some kind of news. What if they find something wrong with your little girl? You think back to all the days when Mary’s headaches prevented her from acting like her normal playful self. The horrific sight of her falling into the pool at Wayne Manor resurfaces in your mind.

After Dick dove into the water it felt like time stood still. Everything felt distant and slow. You remember thinking that they were both underwater for too long. Seconds felt like hours. You remember hearing someone screaming your daughter’s name, but it took you far too long to realize that person was you.

When Dick finally rose to the surface of the pool with Mary in his arms, you felt air rush back into your lungs all at once.

But that didn’t last long.

She was unresponsive, and her small body kept convulsing uncontrollably.

Bruce and Dick barely glanced at each other before running to the car. Somehow you managed to get in the vehicle with them, but the details are fuzzy. All you remember is crying when the doctors took your little girl back into the ER and refused to let you and Dick pass with them.

After a painstaking amount of time, the doctor called you and Dick back into a side room to speak. Mary was in stable condition, but he had some questions about her recent health. You and Dick explained that she seemed perfectly normal aside from semi-frequent headaches. The doctor told you that he wanted to run some tests to make sure nothing serious was wrong with her. These episodes could be completely random and never happen again. Or they could be a sign of what no parent wants to hear.

You twist the pendant around your neck in a nervous release of energy. That was a few days ago, and the results are in. But the doctor hasn’t told you anything yet. Jason and his wife had agreed to watch   
Mary while you come to this appointment so that you could focus fully on the test results. The hospital room is heavy with worry as you, Dick, and Bruce wait for the doctor.

You keep walking back and forth as your mind races. Would it be worse for them to not find anything wrong at all? What if she spends the rest of her life with crippling headaches and sudden seizures? What if they can’t help her? What if—

Dick grabs your hand and anchors you back to the ground. He offers you a comforting smile, but you can still see the worry behind his eyes.

“You’re going to burn a path in the floor if you don’t stop pacing.” He says with a weak smile. He squeezes you hand and gently pats the seat next to him.

“I know. I’m just so worried.” You sigh and sit next to him, resting your head against his shoulder. “What if… What if…” your lip trembles and you fight back tears as you try voicing your fears.

“I know.” He wraps his arm around you so that you are nestled against his chest, and he rests his head against yours. You take the hand of the arm around you, lacing your fingers through his and staring at the slight glint of his wedding band. He squeezes you closer to his body. “We all are.” Bruce nods in agreement from his seat in the corner.

“She’s our baby girl, Dick.” You whimper. “If anything happened to her… I don’t think—”

“Me, too, Y/N. Me, too.” His voice breaks a little, and you both sit for another minute just holding each other. Because what else can you do?

The hospital door opens and you both bolt upright as the doctor walks in with a large folder.

“Mr. and Mrs. Grayson. Mr. Wayne.” The doctor greets you all. “I have the results of Mary’s tests with me. And I’m afraid it’s not good news.”

The air falls out of your lungs and you can’t find the words you need.

“What is it?” Bruce leans forward at full attention. The doctor places images on a backlight to show the physical results of Mary’s tests.

“Mary has a tumor on her brain.”

“Cancer.” You say with a shaky breath. The doctor nods with sad eyes.

“Yes. I’m afraid your daughter has cancer.”

You squeeze Dick’s hand harder than you ever have before. He’s the only thing holding you to the world right now.

“What are her prospects?” Dick asks, his voice tight.

“Keep in mind that money is not an issue.” Bruce adds. “If it will save my granddaughter, we can pay it.”

The doctor nods. “Well, she’s actually fairly lucky, given the circumstances. It’s not an aggressive type of tumor, and it isn’t too terribly large. With radiation treatments to shrink it some more, we can operate and remove the tumor with a fair amount of accuracy. Cases like this one have about an 85-95% success rate.”

Bruce, Dick and the doctor continue to discuss treatment options, but their words are far away in your mind. As if sensing your distress, Dick wraps his arm around you, and you silently thank him for being so steady and level headed at a time like this.

Because you mind is racing and your heart is breaking.

The doctor may have said she has an 85-95% chance of success, but all you can think of is a 5-15% chance of failure.

And you do not like those odds.


	3. Chapter 3

You’re still in shock.

The drive back from the hospital is spent in tense silence.

You and Dick both agreed that Mary doesn’t need to know that there’s a chance she could die. No child should endure that burden. They shouldn’t have to live with that fear.

But you have to tell her something.

Scarcely a noise has been made among the three of you when Bruce pulls up to Jason’s house to pick up Mary. Every step to the door feels like you’re walking through quicksand. And when Jason and his wife greet you just inside the house, they can tell it isn’t good news.

You open your mouth to speak, but you choke on nothing. You want to tell them the results yourself, but the words just won’t come out. It’s almost as if it won’t be real if you don’t say the words.

“It’s cancer.” Bruce is the first to say it.

Jason’s wife gasps and covers her mouth as tears well up in her eyes.

“Holy fuck.” Jason mutters with breathless intensity, and his eyes are wide as he stumbles back against the wall.

“They say her odds are good.” You manage to choke out. However, the tears you have been holding back since the hospital fight their way up with your voice. “But I… I—”

Jason wife engulfs you in a hug as you begin to cry, and though there are tears in her eyes as well, she speaks in a calm soothing voice. “I know you’re scared. You have every reason to be. But we’re all here for you. Have faith in the doctors. Have faith in Mary. Have hope.”

Through your tears you see Dick leaning against Bruce, finally allowing himself to release his own fears as his shoulders shake from his sobs. Bruce is crying as well, though the only real indication is the tears streaming down his face. Jason just stands leaning against the wall, staring at the floor in shock.

Once everyone’s tears finally run dry, you look at Jason and his wife, and Dick walks over to stand beside you.

“Where is Mary?” You ask.

“She’s in the den with Matt and Rosie.” Jason’s wife says before turning around. “I’ll take Matt and Rosie outside so you two can talk to Mary.”

With a shaky sigh you take a step forward with Dick, but when Bruce and Jason try to follow, Dick stops them.

“We need to do this on our own.”

Bruce and Jason nod in agreement and head toward the kitchen. Dick looks down at you.

“Are you ready?”

“No.” You answer honestly. “But I don’t think I ever will be.”

Mary is playing with her Superman doll and looking at books when you walk into the den. You immediately cross the room and sit down beside her before she fully registers that you aren’t Jason or his wife.

“Mommy!” When she sees that it’s you her face lights up and she jumps and throws her arms around you.

“Hi, sweetie.” You laugh. An actual, genuine laugh. “Did you have fun today?”

“Uh huh.” She says before planting herself in your lap, her back pressed against your chest.

“Did you keep Uncle Jason out of trouble?” Dick smiles as Mary keeps playing with her doll.

“Yeah, Uncle Jay says that Superman is stupid, and I told him that’s not a very nice thing to say.” She pouts a bit toward the end of her short story.

“I’m proud of you for telling Uncle Jay when he’s not being nice.” Dick says, and Mary settles back into your chest.

Well.

It’s now or never.

“Mary, we talked to the doctor today.” You wrap your arms around her and press your cheek to her soft curls. “They told us that you’re sick, sweetie. Very sick.”

“But they’re going to take care of you and make you all better.” Dick kneels next to you and brushes a stray hair out of Mary’s face. “They’re going to make your headaches go away so you can run and play with your cousins any time you want.”

“You just have to be strong, baby. You’ll have to be the strong, brave girl we know you are.”

“Just like Superman.” Dick adds with a smile as he holds up Mary’s favorite doll.

“I don’t need to be like Superman.” Mary pushes her doll away before turning in your lap to look at you with her big blue eyes. The same eyes as her father. And the eyes that melt your heart. “I have you,   
Mommy, and you, Daddy. As long as I have you I know I’ll be okay.”

Dick and you both stare at her with a slightly dumbfounded expression for a few seconds. Then you nod your head and smile as tears threaten to escape your eyes yet again. Dick sits on the floor next to you and wraps an arm around your shoulder.

“That’s right sweetie. We’ll be okay as long as we have each other.” You hug her again, and she turns around to grab a book from the pile on the floor.

“Can you both read this, please?” She shoves a small book at you and Dick before settling in between the two of you. You hold one side of the book while Dick holds the other and you take turns reading the sentences from the page.

“I’ll love you forever.” Dick reads, an urgent gentleness in his voice.

“I’ll like you for always.” You say and lean into the two people who bring life to your world. You don’t want this moment to end. If only you could freeze time right now, while you’re all together. While you still have a flicker of hope.

“As long as I’m living.” Dick rubs your back gently and Mary shifts in her seat.

“My baby you’ll be.”


	4. Chapter 4

It all started after Mary’s first treatment.

Suddenly everything felt more real to Dick. This was it. This would determine whether or not he would be able to see his little girl grow up into the beautiful woman he knew she would be. Was he going to lose her? Would she get the opportunity to grow up? Was he going to lose her?

The prospect proved too great for Dick, as he began to detach himself from you and Mary.

Dick starts taking his night job even more seriously than before, spending as much time on patrol as he possibly can just because it’s something that keeps his mind occupied. Every time he sees Mary’s smiling face and bouncing curls, his heart physically hurts. His mind races. How long will that smile last?

He didn’t mean to fall away. Honestly, he didn’t. But he found himself sinking back into a cold familiar darkness that he thought he’d abandoned years ago. Of course he still tried to be strong, if only for Mary’s sake. He would smile and laugh and talk with you and the family, but everyone close to him could see that his smile was nothing more than a façade. A trick he never forgot, and a mask he never took off.

Bruce especially can tell that Dick is hurting. After all, he saw Dick like this when he first took him in. But with every passing day he watches Dick fall farther and farther away. Deeper and deeper into his personal darkness. Bruce wants nothing more than to help, to comfort his son, but by the time Bruce decides to take action, Dick all but outright refuses to let anybody in. Every time Bruce tries to talk to Dick, to tell him that he’s not alone, that he has an entire army of a family he can lean on for support, Dick brushes it off with that performer’s smile.

However, the person most affected by Dick’s depression is you. The two of you had always leaned on each other for support during difficult times. When you heard about Mary’s diagnosis, Dick held onto you until you could force yourself to face reality. But it feels like your rock is gone. You can tell that he’s trying his hardest. He still plays with your little girl, trying to pretend that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with her.

But you know Dick better than anyone else. Hell, sometimes you know Dick better than Dick. And you can see the change. You can see him asking himself why everyone he loves has to suffer. You can see him asking himself what he ever did wrong in his life to deserve losing his parents and now possibly his daughter. Mary was named in memory of his mother. Would the name Mary forever hold a curse to him? A bittersweet memory that stirs both the brightest and darkest moments in his life? He barely made it through his parents’ death. How could he possibly endure his daughter’s?

Dick’s depression compounds after about a month and a half of Mary’s treatments.

He’ll never forget the day he walked into Mary’s room to find you sobbing, holding a frightened and crying Mary. And the black curls on the pillow sent ice through his veins.

It’s real.

It’s really real.

He wanted nothing more than to hold you and Mary right then. He wanted to tell you both that everything would be okay.

But he couldn’t lie to you or Mary like that.

As much as it hurt, he turned and walked away with tears running down his face. Somehow he managed to make it through the day with minimal tears, but as soon as darkness fell, he donned his suit.

The criminals of the city were never as terrified of Nightwing as they were that night.

Even if he can’t save his own daughter, he’s going to save every other little girl he can. The only constant in his life is crime, and he’s placed everything he has into making the city safe, regardless of what his actions may do to his mental state.

The thing that breaks your heart even more than seeing Dick in this self-destructive state is the fact the he has completely shut you out. You’ve never felt so completely and utterly alone in your life. Dick refuses to open up to you, and you’ve been left feeling as though you are going through this whole process by yourself. Normally you would talk to each other about your worries and burdens, and you help each other through them. But now you’re stuck without a shoulder to lean on. Your marriage of mutual support is falling apart.

Your anchor is gone, and it feels like you’re drifting out to sea.

Regardless of the emotional turmoil you both are going through, you never let it show to Mary. After all, she’s the one who is going through the most pain. Cancer treatments are rough on a fully grown adult, let alone a four year old who doesn’t deserve such a fate.

You already knew that life could be cruel. You just didn’t realize how merciless it actually is.


	5. Chapter 5

“Nightwing, there’s an arms deal going down uptown. I’m sending you the location. Meet me in fifteen.” Bruce’s voice speaks in Dick’s ear.

“Don’t you have Robin with you?” Dick says as he leaps across a gap in the rooftops. He’d been pursuing a mugger when Bruce came over the comm, and he would rather not lose the opportunity to take the guy in. “Can’t you call Red Hood or Red Robin for backup? I’m a little busy at the moment.”

“No.” Somehow Bruce’s tone is shorter than usual, and Dick can tell he means business. With an exasperated sigh he shifts his course to the coordinates Bruce sent him.

He keeps an eye out for anything that could possibly be amiss on the way there. But there’s nothing. He scouts the location of the arms deal, but he doesn’t see anything or anybody. Bruce pulled him out here for no reason, and irritation edges its way into Dick’s mind.

Dick lands beside Bruce on a building overlooking the park, and when he speaks to his father, he doesn’t attempt to mask the frustration in his voice.

“Why did you call me here? There’s no arms deal. It’s quiet uptown.”

“I needed to talk to you.” Bruce says without looking at Dick.

“And you couldn’t wait until after patrol?”

“No.”

“Why the hell not? I almost had a thug, Bruce, and you pulled me out here to what? Chat?” Dick tries to hold in his anger, but it starts slipping out.

“You want to know why it can’t wait until after patrol? It’s because you won’t listen to anybody after patrol.” Bruce points his finger at Dick’s chest for emphasis. “Not your brothers. Not me. Not even Y/N.”

“What are you talking about?” Dick clenches his fists as he spits out the words.

“You’re not fooling anyone, Dick. You’re isolating yourself.”

“I’m not listening to this from you of all people.” Dick turns around to leave when Bruce grabs his arm.

“Listen to me.” Dick stops moving but doesn’t turn around to face Bruce. “Every night you walk the length of the city. You brush off everyone’s concerns. I know you’re scared. You’re hurting, Dick. But your wife is hurting, too.”

Dick slumps his shoulders and lowers his head in response. Bruce releases his arm.

“Talk to her, Dick. Really talk to her. She’s afraid of losing Mary. Don’t make her lose her husband, too. Not right now.”

Dick’s mind begins to race. The loneliness he’d been pushing down for the past three months rushes up all at once. In his attempt to guard himself from pain he’d just been amplifying it. He doesn’t want to be alone. 

Before his tears get the best of him, Dick abandons Bruce on the rooftop and runs home.

He needs support.

He needs you.  
___

You kiss sleeping Mary again before going to bed yourself. In the three months since Mary started her treatment, Dick has patrolled the city until the early morning hours. There have only been a handful of times that you have gone to sleep beside your husband, and you’ve grown familiar with going to sleep alone.

So when the familiar figure of your husband shows up in your bedroom window, your mind jumps to the worst case scenario.

“Dick! Are you hurt?” You speak as loud as you dare to with a sleeping toddler in the next room. You run up to him and run your hands up his arms and over his chest. “Are you alright?”

“No, I’m not.” To your surprise Dick pulls you into a tight embrace, pressing your face into his chest as he tucks his face in the space between your shoulder and neck. “But I will be.”

“Dick…” You can’t think of what exactly to say. 

“Y/N, I’m so sorry.” Dick holds on to you as if his life depends on it. “I’ve been so scared of losing Mary that I shut myself out. I thought if I distanced myself that the pain of losing her wouldn’t be as severe. Because I can’t lose another Mary, Y/N. I just can’t.”

When you feel his tears fall against your cheek, you have to fight back your own tears. “Richard.” You say in with a soft sternness and pull back to look Dick in the eyes. The redness from his crying has made his irises brighter than usual, and you brush a tear off his cheek. “She’s still here. She still needs you. Hold your child as tight as you can while she’s still here.”

“It’s just… if I could spare her life. If I knew I could trade her life for mine, I would do it in a heartbeat.” Dick starts crying even harder. “I curse everyone I love. She doesn’t deserve this. She doesn’t deserve me.”

“You stop that right now.” Tears stream down your face as you try to talk sense into your husband. “You do not curse everyone you love. You are the best father that little girl could ever have. No, she doesn’t deserve this, but you know what she does deserve? She deserves to have her parents by her side as she goes through all of this. She’s brave, Dick. She’s strong. Just like her father. Just like you.”

Dick shakes his head and pulls you into his arms again. “I’ve been so alone. And I see now that my actions hurt you and Mary in ways I never intended. Please. Please forgive me, Y/N.”

“I don’t know what the challenges we’re facing are going to bring, but we can’t do it alone. I can’t do it alone. Dick, if I have you by my side I won’t be afraid of what tomorrow brings. Because we can face it together.” You look up at him and wrap your arms around his neck. “All four of us.”

Dick stills suddenly at your last statement. “Four? You don’t mean…”

You simply nod your head and smile through your tears. Dick gasps as he tries to comprehend the words you didn’t have to say.

“Just don’t leave us like this again.” You look at him, and his eyes suddenly focus on you with a sharp intensity.

“Never.” He holds you close with a different kind of embrace. One that conveys more love and tenderness that you would ever think imaginable. “I swear, I will stay by your side until the day I die. I will stay by you and our children.”

For the first time in a long time, you and your husband fall asleep in each other’s arms.

For the first time in a long time, you aren’t afraid of tomorrow.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is probably going to be the happiest, fluffiest chapter to this thing
> 
> Woo Lego Batman references lol

“Daddy, Mommy, look! I’m just like Aunt Harper now!” Mary jumps up and down while pointing at Harper’s shaved hair; she even tugs on your hand for emphasis.

“That’s right kiddo!” Harper says as Mary runs up to her. Without missing a beat Harper picks your little girl up and hugs her. “You’re one of the cool kids now!”

It had been about a week since you and Dick had talked to Mary and all agreed that the best thing to do was to go ahead and shave her head. The doctors seem to think the cancer treatments are working, but the panic and emotional turmoil Mary would go through every her hair fell out was too much for your heart to take.

Of course Mary didn’t want to cut her hair at first. You didn’t either. Luckily Mary had always looked up to Harper, so when Dick mentioned that she would look like her aunt Mary was much more willing to comply.

Still, it didn’t make the pain of watching her beautiful black curls fall to the ground any easier. You just kept reminding yourself that this is only temporary. Everything will go back to normal if—when. When Mary gets better. Not if. When. Soon you would be a happy little family of four.

You and Dick still hadn’t told the rest of the family about your pregnancy yet, and since Alfred had been so kind as to organize a tea party for Mary, you decided it would be the perfect opportunity to reveal the news.

“Not only is she a cool kid. She’s also a princess!” Stephanie bursts around the corner and places a tiara on Mary’s head and hands her a pink frilly wand.

“Can I be a princess if I don’t have any hair?” Mary looks up at Steph and Harper with big blue eyes.

Stephanie’s smile only falters for an instant before she recovers her bubbly smile. “Of course, Mary! Being a princess isn’t about what’s here.” She rubs her thumb from Mary’s temple to where her hair once was. “It’s about what’s here that makes a princess.” She pokes Mary in the chest before moving her hands to the girl’s sides to tickle her.

When Bruce walks in the room Mary stops laughing by using sheer willpower. Holding in her smile and pointing at Bruce, she makes her first royal declaration with a wave of her wand. “If I’m a princess then I’m gonna make Grandpa a princess, too!”

“Princess Bruce?” Harper asks as she carries Mary to her seat at the dining table.

“No, Princess Grandpa!”

“Princess Grandpa. That has a certain ring to it.” Jason says as he enters the room with Rosie in his arms. His wife follows behind, holding Matt’s hand, and they all take a seat as Tim, Damian, and Cass come in and take their seats, too.

The table is quickly filled with love and laughter as the tea party starts. The joy on Mary’s face as she ‘hosts’ her part makes your heart sing, though your daughter’s happy face briefly turned sour when   
Tim asked for coffee instead of tea.

After giving everyone enough time to settle in and warm up, you grab Dick’s hand. “Everyone, I—we have an announcement to make.”

Everyone stops and stares at you with wide eyes, afraid of what news you have to deliver and with everything that’s been going on you can hardly blame them.

Dick gives your hand a reassuring squeeze. “I’m pregnant.”

“We’re going to have another baby.” Dick adds with a smile.

The staring doesn’t stop, but the uniform feeling of tense fear shifts to excitement. Suddenly you’re flooded with congratulations and happy tears.

“You mean I’m going to be a big sister?!” Mary squeals in excitement and bounce up and down in her seat, and her reaction makes everyone laugh. “If it’s a baby sister can her name be Wonder Woman?”

You laugh and try thinking of the best way to let her down easily. “Sweetheart, I realize you love Wonder Woman, but that might not be the best name for a baby sister.”

“Superman then.” Why aren’t you surprised she jumped to another superhero?

“I don’t think that will work either, Sweetheart.”

“Why not?”

“Well—” you stop mid-sentence when you look at your husband, his mouth partially open as if he’s about to speak. “No.”

Dick is slightly taken aback. “Y/N, you don’t even know what I was going to say.”

“Honey, I have been married to you for quite a while now. I know that look in your eyes, and I’m telling you right now that we are not naming our second child Superman.”

“But Mary suggested it.”

“She is also four, but nice try.”

“What about Batman?” Jason asks.

“No. Batman is a loser. I like Superman.” Mary says before you can respond to Jason’s question. Across the table Bruce chokes on his tea.

“But who has the coolest gadgets?” Bruce asks Mary.

“Batman.” Tim stares into his coffee cup.

“Who has the tricked out ride?”

“Batman.” Tim says again.

“Who always pays his taxes?”

Tim snorts. “Not Batman.” Bruce looks at Tim, silently asking him to pick a side and stick to it.

“Superman. It’s definitely Superman.” Jason says.

“See! I guess it’ll have to be Superman.” Dick turns to you, and you roll your eyes at his ridiculous behavior.

“Honey, please be serious about what we name our child.”

“Y/N, your husband’s name is Dick.” Jason pipes up.

“That may be, but I imagine you have been called that on more than one occasion by everyone in this room.”

Jason opens his mouth to shoot a comeback, but Mary pipes up from beside you with a sudden serious expression.

“Mommy?”

“What is it, Sweetie?” You ask in a soft, sweet voice.

“Will you and Daddy love the new baby more than me?” She asks without looking you in the eye.

“Of course not! What would possibly make you think that?” You are shocked at her question, and you can feel Dick’s demeanor shift from carefree to serious.

“Well, the new baby won’t be broken like I am. Won’t you like it better?” She sniffles as tears well up in her eyes.

“Oh, Mary.” You pick her up and pull her into your lap and hold her to your chest. “You are not broken.”

“But the doctor says I’m really sick. I don’t even have hair anymore.” Mary’s voice is muffled and her tears are seeping into your shirt. Dick wraps one arm around you and rubs Mary’s back with the other hand.

“Alfred doesn’t have hair anymore. Is he broken?” Dick asks softly?

There’s a pause for a few seconds while Mary thinks about it. “No.”

“Mary, you are our Little Bird. And there’s nothing that can change that. We will love you forever, and we’ll like you for always.” Dick starts quoting from Mary’s favorite story in an attempt to make her feel better.

You kiss the top of her head. “As long as we’re living, our baby you’ll be.”

As you sit with your little girl’s cheeks drying and your husband’s arms around you, a sudden rush of strength and love washes over you.

You will make it through this. And the love of your family is what will keep you going until the race is done.


	7. Chapter 7

“Oh, you’ve brought more!” You say with a slightly pained laugh as Bruce walks in Mary’s hospital room bearing the fifth balloon bouquet this week. Bruce passes the giant cluster of balloons to Dick, and your husband takes them to the half of the room that is filled with balloons and giant stuffed animals and sets them beside a particularly fluffy lion.

“Of course! Anything to make my little bird smile!” Bruce swoops over to where Mary is sitting in her bed to shower her in tickles and kisses, causing her bright laughter to fill the dull room. “You’re going to have all kinds of animal friends to play with when you get home, aren’t you Little Bird?”

“Yeah! Will you play with me Grandpa? We can have a tea party!” Mary’s face lights up at the idea of a play date with Bruce.

“What if I make a deal with you, Mary? I will have a tea party with you as soon as you feel better.” Bruce chuckles and gives her a playful poke in the side. “Do you think we can do that?”

“Uh-huh!” Mary nods aggressively. “I can do that because the doctor is gonna make me all better today!”

You smile at your daughter’s enthusiasm and positive attitude, happy that she isn’t afraid of what’s to come. You wish you had her bravery. Inside your emotions are a mess, and it feels like any small occurrence could send you into an emotional wreck.

Today is the day that could change everything. It’s the day of Mary’s surgery.

Though the doctors are confident that everything will go well and that Mary will make a full recovery, but you aren’t so sure. There’s a dark cloud in the back of your mind that keeps raining doubt. But as her mother it’s your job to be worried, right?

When you look into Dick’s eyes you see his fear as well. But you’ve been trying to put on a positive front for your family. For Mary. You try to follow the words of encouragement from Jason’s wife.

Have hope.

Have faith.

And looking at how happy your little girl is as she sits on a hospital bed surrounded by a plethora of stuffed animals and balloons, giggling as her grandpa and father take turns tickling her, you almost feel like she has a chance.

___

You can’t seem to sit still.

It’s been hours since they took Mary pack to start the procedure, and every second that passes feels like a day. You brought several things to pass the time, but your mind just won’t focus on them. It keeps wandering to what ifs.

What if they can’t do anything?

What if it comes back?

What if the operation doesn’t help at all?

What if she doesn’t even make it through the operation?

What if—

Dick squeezes your knee and pulls you back to the waiting room. You turn your head to look at him, and he laces his fingers with yours and kisses your cheek before talking softly in your ear.

“I’m worried, too, Y/N.” He squeezes your hand and you lean into him. “But she’ll be fine. She’s in good hands.”

You don’t say anything but nod in response and rest your head against his shoulder. If only time would pass faster. This waiting is killing you slowly.

“Mr. and Mrs. Grayson?” the receptionist calls from her desk, and you stand up instantly, almost bumping Dick’s nose in the process. When the receptionist meets your and Dick’s eyes, she smiles and gestures to the side door. “The doctor is almost ready to see you.”

You and Dick scramble to gather your things and make it through the door the receptionist pointed out. When you walk through the door and are greeted with yet another waiting room—this one is smaller and private—you feel like the hospital is just trying to suffocate you with suspense.

Dick sits down in one of the five chairs and pulls your hand to get you to sit next to him. You comply, and, though it feels like hours, only a few minutes pass before the knob on the other door in the room turns.

The doctor walks in the room with a grim expression, and your heart immediately sinks while your blood runs cold. He sits in a chair across from you and Dick, and the exhaustion in his eyes is painfully apparent. He opens his mouth to speak, and you cling to Dick’s arm and prepare for the worst.

This is it.

It’s over.

It has to be.

“Mary will be fine.” Your entire body feel like jelly and you lean against Dick as tears of relief threaten to spill over.

“Of course we can’t know for sure immediately.” The doctor leans back in his chair as he continues. “But she did exceptionally well in surgery, and in most cases like hers a full recovery is expected without any further treatment. We will want to keep her here for a couple of days, though, just to make sure she doesn’t have any adverse response to the anesthesia or medication.”

“When can we see her?” Dick asks, barely managing to hide the emotion in his voice.

“She should be waking up any time now.” The doctor stands up and walks toward the door. He shoots you both a weak smile. “You have a very strong and brave little girl. She should be around for many years to come.”

The weight of the world has been lifted off your shoulders.

Mary is okay.

And soon you will be, too.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last part of this this fic, and I want to thank all of you for reading it! I hope you've enjoyed it!

“Do I get to have my tea party with Grandpa when we get home?” Mary asks as you buckle her into her car seat. Even though the car is filled with all kinds of new stuffed animals and plushies, she still clings to her Superman plush.

“Yes, sweetie. Grandpa is following us home with the rest of your toys, and you can have your tea party then.” You smile and kiss her head before shutting her door and sliding into the front seat.

“So, Mary.” Dick looks at her through the rear view mirror as he pulls out onto the highway. “Do I get to keep the stuffed animals?”

“No!” Mary smiles.

“Why not?” Dick asks in mock offense. “I thought they were for me!”

“They’re not for you, Daddy, they’re for me!” Mary laughs and holds her Superman tighter to her chest.

“Y/N, did you know they were for Mary?” Dick glances at you with a slight smirk but quickly focuses his attention back to the road.

“No, I thought they were for the new baby.” You play along and place your hand over your growing stomach. Mary doesn’t object to this statement.

“Mommy, I’ll share my toys with the new baby any time.” When you look back Mary’s face is serious, and the crease between her eyes looks just like Dick when he’s in full Officer Grayson or Nightwing Mode.

“That’s very kind of you, Mary. But the baby won’t need to play with your toys for a while after it gets here, so you have plenty of time to play with them yourself.” You smile at her, and the crease between her eyes slowly disappears as her smile comes back.

“Hey, Mommy, Daddy. Can you tell me a story?” Mary crosses her arms across her doll as she asks the question. You and Dick exchange a quick glance before you start reciting her favorite story.

“I’ll love you forever.” Dick starts the chorus, and he glances at Mary through the mirror.

“I’ll like you for always.” You turn your head to see Mary’s smile, and to make sure she knows you mean every word of it.

“As long as I’m living.” Dick continues taking your hand in his, and you speak to finish the phrase.

“My baby you’ll—”

But you don’t get to finish.

Because at that moment your world turns upside down and blackness surrounds you.

___

The rain falling on the swarm of black umbrellas is a painfully fitting mood for the occasion. Bruce never thought he would have to endure this. He never thought he would watch another one of his children be lowered into the ground.

But this isn’t like when Jason died. This isn’t just Dick. This is Dick and you and your unborn child.

Bruce vividly remembers how it happened. It’s an event that will haunt him for the rest of his life.

He was driving behind you and Dick as you returned home. Everything was going smoothly. The sun was shining and the traffic was light. Bruce didn’t even see the car that pulled out in front of Dick before it actually happened.

Everything seemed to move in slow motion. There was no way Dick could respond to that car in time, and he was driving at highway speed. As soon as the vehicles collided Bruce watched as the car his family was in lifted into the air and spun before landing upside down on the side of the road.

Bruce’s Batman instincts instantly took over as he slammed on his brakes and jumped out of his car, dialing 911 in the process. After everything his family has been through, you, Dick, and Mary can’t die. Not like this.

The crumpled metal frame and shattered glass caused Bruce’s heart to sink, but the sight that turned his stomach was that of you and Dick pinned to your seats by pieces of shrapnel. He called out your names but neither of you respond. That was when he noticed the amount of blood forming around you.

Knowing that time was crucial, Bruce pulled you and Dick from the vehicle before pulling Mary out. Luckily she seemed to be the most unscathed—she was unconscious, but she was breathing.

Which was more than Bruce could say for you and Dick.

He knew before the paramedics even arrived.

Bruce reluctantly handed Mary away to the paramedics when they arrived, and he watched with a broken heart as they covered the forms of you and Dick before carrying you away. There was nothing they could do.

There was nothing he could do.

Even now he holds Mary to his chest as pounds and pounds of soil are poured over the caskets of his son and daughter in law. And if the experience itself wasn’t painful enough, little Mary’s innocence is enough to push him over the edge.

“Grandpa, why are they burying Mommy and Daddy?” Mary looks at Bruce with Dick’s blue eyes as she leans away from him a bit.

“They’re gone, little bird.” Bruce can’t look her in the eye. Instead he watches as they fill the space next to Thomas and Martha’s grave with fresh soil.

“But aren’t they coming back? They have to be here for the new baby!” Mary’s distress causes everyone at the service to break down more than they already had.

“They aren’t coming back, Mary, and there isn’t going to be a new baby.” Bruce has to tighten his grip on Mary as she starts squirming.

“But they have to come back! Mommy and Daddy said they’ll love me forever! If they leave that means they don’t anymore!” Mary starts crying and Bruce pulls her into his chest again, letting her tears stain his suit.

“Mary.” Bruce rubs her back and speaks in a comforting tone. “They did love you. They loved you very, very much.”

“I want Mommy and Daddy.” Mary sobs into Bruce’s suit, and Bruce doesn’t try to stop the tears that fall down his face.

“I’ll love you, Mary.” Bruce vows. He’s lost so much. Mary has lost so much, but he knows she will persevere. She’s a Grayson after all. Bruce only wishes this beautiful little girl didn’t have suffer the same tragic childhood as her father. Already Mary has been through more than most grown adults will ever endure. And here, as he lays his son and daughter in law to rest next to his own parents, he makes a promise to the only remnant he has left of his eldest son. “I’ll love you forever. I’ll like you for always. As long as I’m living, my baby you’ll be.”


End file.
